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“Aircraft Carriers in the Cornfields: The Shiblanja Doctrine and the Panic of the Unipolar World”

 Comprehensive Analysis: "Trump Sends Rubio to Moscow and Beijing Over Shablanga's Military Pact" A Satirical Text by Al-Nadim Al-Raqmi (The Digital Nadim) --- URGENT / US President Donald Trump sent his Secretary of State Marco Rubio on an urgent shuttle mission to Moscow and Beijing following the signing of the military cooperation protocol between the Triple Alliance countries (Shablanga - Russia - China) yesterday in Beijing, in an attempt to dissuade China and Russia from proceeding with implementing the agreement. An agreement had been reached between Shablanga, represented by Abbouda Masbah, owner of the blacksmithing and turning workshop in Shablanga, and the Chinese and Russian Ministers of Military Industries, for China to manufacture three fifth-generation aircraft carriers and ten nuclear-powered submarines for Shablanga, as well as for Russia to establish a nuclear reactor for electricity production in Shablanga. The White House spokesman stated that the Unit...
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"Shablanga Imposes 150% Tariffs on US Products in Escalating Trade War"

 Comprehensive Analysis: "Shablanga Imposes 150% Tariffs on US Products in Escalating Trade War" A Satirical Masterpiece by Al-Nadim Al-Raqmi (The Digital Nadim) --- URGENT / Shablanga imposes 150% tariffs on agricultural products, production supplies, electronic devices, American cars, and others, in response to US President Donald Trump's decision to impose 100% tariffs on Fateer Meshaltet imported by the United States from Shablanga. This step comes within the framework of the escalating economic war between them, which has intensified recently following the signing by Hajj Abdel Shakour Abdel Da'im, Mayor of Shablanga, of the Triple Military Alliance Agreement with the leaders of China and Russia last month, alongside the rising star of Hajj Abdel Shakour and his international political influence. This has provoked Trump's ire, as he considers it a serious threat to the security and interests of the United States as a sole superpower in the world, a unipolar h...
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“The Arab Summit for Greater Israel: Diplomacy in the Age of Voluntary Surrender”

 📰 Satirical Title: “The Arab Summit for Greater Israel: Diplomacy in the Age of Voluntary Surrender” English Translation Breaking News / An extraordinary Arab summit will convene tomorrow in Jordan, attended by Benjamin Netanyahu and all Arab kings and presidents, to discuss the final arrangements for establishing the “Greater Israel” project, including executive steps and finishing touches ahead of its official announcement following the anticipated war between the United States and Israel against Iran. Ahmed Aboul Gheit, Secretary-General of the Arab League, stated that Arab foreign ministers met today in preparation for the summit and submitted a working paper containing proposals, ideas, recommendations, and frameworks to be presented and discussed with the Israeli delegation for its approval. The document reportedly outlines each Arab country’s contribution of territories falling within the scope of the “sacred Talmudic promise” project, as well as arrangements concerning Ar...
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“The Great Shiblanja Expansion: When Rural Diplomacy Meets Global Conspiracy”

 📰 Satirical Title: “The Great Shiblanja Expansion: When Rural Diplomacy Meets Global Conspiracy” English Translation Breaking News / The Mayor of Menyet El-Sebaa (Qalyubia Governorate) has called for an urgent “Qalyubia Summit” bringing together the villages of Toukh, Qalyub, Banha, El-Qanater, El-Khanka, and Shibin El-Qanater in an emergency meeting to discuss revelations contained in the so-called “Epstein leaks.” The leaks allegedly include dangerous correspondence between Hajj Abdel Shakour Abdel Dayem, Mayor of Shiblanja (Qalyubia), and former U.S. presidents, the Director of the CIA, leading figures from international political, financial, economic, and media elites, as well as influential members of both the U.S. Congress and House of Representatives in Washington’s upper circles of power. According to the reports, Hajj Abdel Shakour has been pursuing a strategic plan to establish “Greater Shiblanja,” extending from Al-Basousiya Canal in the north to Al-Sharqawiya Canal in...
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