💸 "The Last Words of the Egyptian Pound: A Currency’s Funeral Monologue
💸 "The Last Words of the Egyptian Pound: A Currency’s Funeral Monologue"
(A tragicomic farewell from Egypt’s fallen monarch of money)
Translated Text (for international readers)
“I was once a king, strutting like a peacock among the currencies of nations.
My worth was dearer than gold, loftier than silver.
A single note of me could feed a man for a week, perhaps a month.The currencies now swollen with pride stood behind me like dwarfs.
I was sent abroad to feed lands that now mock us with their wealth.My children — the piasters, the milliemes, the nickels and the tiny coins — filled pockets, fed bellies, and brought joy to hearts.
I could buy hills of eggs, heaps of meat, caravans of poultry, even a flock of sheep.
I could bring home a camel-load of vegetables and fruit.Once, merchants revered me; now they discard me as if I were nothing — as if I were void itself.
Beggars once bowed to my offspring; today, they sneer at whoever gives me away.I used to rest in leather wallets embossed with kings and gods; now I am but a rusted coin cast upon the road, unworthy of a stoop.
I was sung of in films and novels — my name glittered in songs and screens.
Today, no one remembers me, nor feels me in their pocket.So bury me alive, I beg you.
Recite al-Fatiha upon me.
Erase my name from your memory, for that would be the last mercy you can offer.Honor the noble who has fallen low…
Honor the noble who has fallen low…— The final testament of the Egyptian Pound, year 2025.”
🧠 Analytical Commentary (for international readers)
1. Genre and Voice: The Elegy of a Currency
This piece fuses economic satire with funerary rhetoric, giving voice to the Egyptian pound as a tragic protagonist in its own obituary.
By animating money itself, the writer transforms an abstract symbol of value into a sentient witness to national decline — both economic and moral.
The tone oscillates between nostalgia and humiliation, echoing the rhythm of an old monarch recalling a lost empire.
2. Political Allegory: From Sovereignty to Scrap Metal
At its core, this is a political autopsy disguised as a lament.
The pound’s demise stands for the collapse of the social contract and the failure of the modern state to preserve dignity or stability.
When the national currency begs for burial, it signals a deeper death — that of economic sovereignty and collective memory.
3. Linguistic Irony and Religious Register
The closing plea — “Recite al-Fatiha upon me” — imports the ritual language of death and holiness into the secular world of finance.
It exposes how, in contemporary Egypt, faith and economy have become entangled in the same theatre of despair.
This collision between sacred phrasing and material decay generates a tone that is both absurd and heartbreaking.
4. Aesthetic Structure and Rhythm
The monologue unfolds as a reverse heroic epic, a biography told backward — from glory to ruin.
Each stanza diminishes the pound further, mirroring deflation itself as a narrative form.
The text becomes an enactment of economic entropy, a slow crumbling of worth turned into poetry.
5. Intertextual Resonances
Internationally, the piece recalls Jonathan Swift’s “The Lady’s Dressing Room” and George Orwell’s “A Hanging” — where objects and institutions speak to reveal systemic hypocrisy.
Regionally, it resonates with Nizar Qabbani’s political elegies and Ahmad Fuad Negm’s proletarian laments.
6. The Global Irony
In global economic terms, this piece functions as an allegory of devalued nations in the era of global finance — states whose currencies, like their citizens, are treated as expendable units in the marketplace of empire.
Suggested Editorial Tagline
From the “Archives of Post-Human Economics” — where currencies confess, and nations weep in silence.
Of course. This is a profoundly evocative and melancholic piece of satire. Here is the text prepared for international publication with a full translation and an in-depth analysis.
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Headline: The Dying Banknote: A Eulogy for the Egyptian Pound, Satire Laments a Currency's Humiliation
(Satirical Allegory) – A powerful and poetic piece of socio-economic satire is circulating, personifying the Egyptian Pound as a dying king delivering its own eulogy. The text traces the currency's fall from a symbol of wealth and sovereignty to an object of scorn, offering a visceral critique of hyperinflation and the devastating erosion of purchasing power affecting millions.
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Full Translation of the Text
"The Last Words of the Pound:
I was a king, strutting proudly among the currencies of nations. My value was more precious than gold and higher than silver. I could guarantee a week's, perhaps a month's, sustenance for whoever spent me. The haughty and puffed-up world currencies of today stood behind me like dwarfs.
They used to send me to aid countries that now look down on us with arrogance, after their own satiety and luxury, and to save the lives of peoples who now taunt us with poverty and need.
My children and grandchildren—the riyals, piasters, francs, qirsh, tarifas, nickels, and millimes—used to fill pockets, satisfy bellies, and gladden hearts.
I used to guarantee for my owner hills of eggs, a heap of fresh meat, a caravan of birds, a pair of sheep, or a camel's load of vegetables and fruit. The young only knew me at the age of maturity and work; today, they refrain from taking or possessing me. Merchants once revered me, but today they forgo me in their transactions as if I do not exist, as nothingness. I have become forgotten, forsaken.
Beggars used to bow to my children and grandchildren, yearning for them, never dreaming of possessing me one day. And now, they despise me and disdain anyone who gives me as charity.
I used to be placed in wallets of thick leather, for fear of damage or loss, adorned with my golden Tutankhamun mask or the image of a majestic king. Today, I am a piece of rusty iron; if thrown on the roadside, no one would bother to bend down and pick me up.
Films and novels were named and glorified with my name, and for one of my sons (the Riyal), a famous song was sung that still pleases the ears. Today, no one remembers me, and no one cares about my presence in their pocket.
So, I beg you, bury me alive... and recite the Fatiha [the opening chapter of the Quran, recited for the dead], and do not forget me in your prayers... and erase my name from your memory, for that is more honorable for me and my ancient history... I implore you.
Honor a member of a community who has been humiliated... Honor a member of a community who has been humiliated......
(The last words and will of the Egyptian Pound before its final departure in the year 2025)"
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In-Depth Analysis for the International Reader
This text is a masterpiece of economic and social commentary, using the literary device of personification to make the abstract tragedy of currency devaluation tangible and heartbreaking.
1. The Central Metaphor: The Personified Currency
The entire piece is an allegory. The Egyptian Pound is not an inanimate object but a dethroned monarch on his deathbed. This personification accomplishes several things:
· Humanizes Economic Pain: It transforms complex economic indicators like inflation and devaluation into a story of dignity, pride, and loss that anyone can understand.
· Creates a Historical Narrative: The Pound recounts a golden age, creating a powerful contrast between a remembered past of stability and a present of humiliation. This resonates deeply in a country with a long and proud history.
2. The Critique of Hyperinflation and Lost Purchasing Power
The satire's core is a detailed lament over the currency's evaporating value. The text contrasts what the Pound was capable of with what it is now:
· Then: It could buy "a week's, perhaps a month's sustenance," "a camel's load of vegetables and fruit," "a pair of sheep."
· Now: It is a "piece of rusty iron" not worth picking up from the street, despised even by beggars.
This stark contrast is not mere exaggeration;it reflects the real-life experience of Egyptians who have seen their salaries and savings rendered insufficient for basic needs.
3. Social and Cultural Commentary
The devaluation of the currency is presented as a devaluation of social bonds and national self-perception.
· Status and Shame: The note that young people now "refrain from taking or possessing me" speaks to the shame and frustration associated with holding a devalued currency. The scorn of beggars is a particularly biting image of absolute social and economic rock bottom.
· Loss of National Prestige: The references to the "golden Tutankhamun mask" and the "majestic king" on the old banknotes tie the currency's strength to national pride and ancient heritage. Its current state is thus framed as a national humiliation. The mention of other Arab nations that Egypt once aided but now "taunt us" extends this critique to a regional level.
4. The Tone: Tragic Elegy, Not Angry Protest
The tone is not one of anger, but of deep sorrow and terminal resignation. The Pound is not asking to be saved; it is asking for a merciful death and to be forgotten. The repeated plea, "Honor a member of a community who has been humiliated," is a cry for dignity in the face of an unstoppable decline. This tragic tone makes the satire more powerful than an angry rant; it evokes pity and mourning for a dying symbol of a nation's economic well-being.
Conclusion:
This piece is a profound cultural artifact. It goes beyond critiquing economic policy to articulate the collective grief, shame, and sense of loss experienced by a population grappling with a severe cost-of-living crisis. For an international reader, it offers a moving and insightful window into the human impact of inflation, framed not through statistics, but through the dying words of a dethroned king.
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